Monday, April 27, 2009

Battling through the blahs

As I sit at my desk, looking out the window at even more SNOW, my mind is feeling pretty empty.

I should be filling this space with something witty.  I should be doing edits on Ghost Mountain.  I should be working on the next book.  I should be reviewing pages for my critique partner, since we are scheduled to meet in a few hours.  I should be showering.

Instead, I sit here.  Not really doing much.

Normally, I would chalk it up to being lazy.  Or the weather.  (Have I ever mentioned how much I truly hate snow?)  But I think I've narrowed down the reason for my blahs.  

Grief.

Let me explain.  I had to announce three deaths last week for an organization I'm involved in.  Each of those deaths required me to attend (at the very least) a memorial service/viewing.  When you can see and communicate with spirits, the funeral home isn't on your "favorite places to spend an hour" list.  I'm sure it's even worse for those who are more empathic then I am.  Thankfully, none of these people were related, and they all were in their 80's, so it wasn't a "shocking" thing.  Still, it wasn't easy -- for their loved ones or for me.

Anyway, I managed to do the memorials and ever since have been really down.  

And now we will be missing one of our bloggers.  (No, nothing bad happened to her, she just opted out of the blog to focus on other things.)  

Another loss.

So I sit at my desk, praying for warmer weather and bluer skies.  For the health, wealth, and happiness of my friends and their families.  For an end to loss.

Don't get me wrong, I know that loss is necessary for growth.  I know that "dead leaves" must be picked for new ones to flourish.  But I'm ready for that phase to be over.  

OK, I've whined enough...  now, back to work!

Blessings!
Nichole

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